A Pedestal Hero No More
by WitchJuliana
Summary: As Chat Noir, he can become the hero everyone loves and adores. The one who saves the day with Ladybug. But Adrien, Adrien can't save anyone. He's just a model with nothing to show for. When an explosive akuma shows up at his school, Adrien is forced to face this realization with a missing casualty. May become a two-shot.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Inspired by Caprette's comic. Found here: caprette . tumblr post / 132698293288 / im-sure-she-made-it-out-in-time # notes**

 **DISCLAIMER: I do not own The Miraculous Tales of Ladybug and Chat Noir. All rights belong to Thomas Astruc.**

* * *

Akuma attacks tend to be sudden and without warning, Adrien discovered. The unpredictable attacks were something to be counted on, surprisingly enough, as they were sure to happen one way or another.

What he didn't expect was for there to be an especially violent attack on his school. It was sudden, like usual, and the akuma had possessed an angry chemistry student. Whether it was the work of Chloe was beyond him, but before he knew it, a loud explosion shook the building as students screamed and the akuma victim's cackles resonated throughout the halls. His teacher was frantic, trying to get her students out of the classroom safely as he tried to slip away to transform.

But his bad luck was working its wonders again, as another explosion went off in the classroom front of him. Before he could react, the explosion blasted him back as pieces of cement and debris flew through the air. His head made connection with something (probably debris as he later figured out), and the world faded to black.

/-/-/-/

"...could he be?!" The frustrated voice of his lady slowly roused him from his forceful slumber, his head throbbing as he struggles to move. With a groan, he raises his hand up to his head and feels a sticky liquid grace the palm of his hand, and he groans even louder.

"...Adrien?" A strong voice calls out to him, and Ladybug swings in in front of him, her eyes looking over his form with worry and noticing the blood that was slowly making a trail down his face. If he had been Chat, he would have grinned and made a comment about how his lady was worrying for her alleycat. But he wasn't Chat.

He was just Adrien. And Adrien didn't flirt with a superhero while in pain. His voice comes out hoarsely, words barely audible as she leans down to pick him up.

"W-wait…" He needs to get away, to transform. He can't hear anything over the crackle of the collapsing building or the roar of the countless fires. He's terrified to try listening for screams as Adrien, because Adrien can't do anything but worry. "What a.. about the o-others?" Ladybug doesn't spare a glance at him as she searches for a way out.

"Safe." Her response is brisk and sharp, her eyebrows furrowed in concentration as she dashes forward, avoiding the flames and cradling him carefully against her body.

Months spent as her partner had allowed him to recognize when his lady was genuinely stressed and worried because of an akuma attack, and the beads of sweat lining her forehead couldn't just be the result of the fires that surrounded them. A pillar collapses in front of them and she curses, quickly skidding to a stop and running to her right. She's aiming for the window, fires be damned as she charges forward with Adrien in her arms. He braces for impact before realizing that Ladybug had curled herself around him just enough to get the brunt of the impact. She lands on the ground and almost drops him on accident, barely regaining her footing as she stumbles forward.

The clear air makes it easier to hear the shouts and screams from the people that were safe outside the building. He breathes a sigh of relief when he can hear Nino shouting for Adrien and Alya shouting for Marinette-

Wait.

Marinette?

He listens more closely, and Alya's desperate cries become more and more clear.

"MARINETTE? MARINETTE, WHERE ARE YOU?! MARINETTE, PLEASE!" Her voice is cracking, her tears barely contained as she calls out hopelessly for her best friend.

And that's when he realizes that Marinette was still left inside.

Was she screaming when he was trying to block out the noise?

Had he ignored her cries for help?

He looks up at Ladybug, her face strangely stoic as she trudges forward with him still in her arms. He summons up his voice again, trying to get her attention.

"Ladybug," he starts, forcing his voice to remain stable and (somewhat) strong as he continues, "Marinette in still inside." She doesn't look at him, and instead avoids his gaze. Something inside him drops, and his breath quickens as he looks over her shoulder, the building ablaze and crumbling.

"There's no time to go back." Her words are final and without remorse, something so uncharacteristic of his lady that he almost breaks his gaze away from the building to look at her in shock. Was this the same girl he had been pining for? He tries again, because surely, Ladybug would never leave a civilian to die under the hands of an akuma attack.

"But Lady-" An explosion cuts him off, blasting the air around them as she quickly crouches down and shields him from the blast. Debris rains down as the building collapses in on itself, creating a destroyed visage of the school he once went to. Alya's scream pierces the air as she sobs and screams Marinette's name out louder, more desperately than before. Adrien feels his breath catch in his throat as he stares at the destroyed building, flames erupting from it more brilliantly than before.

Nobody could have survived that.

Marinette couldn't have survived from that.

Marinette.

Her name repeats over and over again in his mind as Ladybug stands up again, making her way towards the group of survivors ( _no not the group of survivors group of victims because Marinette can't be dead she can't be)_ as their cries grew gradually louder.

"...Marinette." He finally manages to speak again, his gaze dazed as he stares as the fires consuming the building.

"I'm sure she made it out in time." Ladybug keeps her gaze steady as her grasp remains unyielding on Adrien. He begins to shake and tremble at the thought of Marinette.

The sweet girl who sat behind him in class.

The upcoming fashion designer with so much talent.

The one who could barely speak without blushing and stuttering around him.

The friend he held dearly in his heart.

 _His princess._

"Marinette." He repeats her name, his voice shaking as he realizes that she could be dead. "Marinette!" Maybe, maybe if he yells her name, she'll respond to him, and she'll be okay. "MARINETTE! MARINETTE! _MARINETTE!_ " His screaming becomes desperate as he struggles in Ladybug's arms and she speaks to him quietly, and he can barely register her begging him to stop struggling, she's fine, don't worry, but he doesn't believe a word she says because _why else would Alya be screaming and crying right now?_

"LET ME GO!" He yells and screams and struggles, because he has to get away he has to transform and save her, his friend his princess, Marinette, he has to save Marinette. "MARINETTE! MARINETTE! SHE'S STILL IN THERE! _LET ME GO!"_ His voice is cracking and straining, but he doesn't give up. Ladybug's hold on him is tight and firm, and she has no intention letting him go.

He realizes that he's not acting like Adrien. But at the same time, he doesn't think he's acting like Chat Noir either. He's acting desperate, purely out of human instinct as he fights against Ladybug, pushing against the pain and exhaustion because he has to _protect Marinette_ but he _can't_. With a loud sigh, Ladybug gently drops him to the ground and he almost gets up to bolt away, only to have Nino grab him in a crushing hold.

"Adrien!" He yells into his ear and hugs him tightly and Adrien can almost hear the tears in his voice, the ones threatening to gush out if he wasn't so stubbornly Nino. "I thought I lost you, dude! One second you were right next to me, and the next you were gone. I was so freaking scared and worried!" Nino gushes out word after word, but Adrien can feel someone staring at him intensely. He looks up to meet Alya's gaze, tears still streaming as she stares at him with wide eyes.

"...You were calling her name." Nino stops speaking as the statement hangs in the air. Alya collapses to her knees, as the thought of her best friend lying charred among the flames burns graphically in her mind. Adrien immediately looks around for Ladybug, but she's gone somewhere, presumably after the akuma because there was no one else left to save.

There was no one else left to save.

His fists clench tightly as he whispers her name out again. "...Marinette."

/-/-/-/

When he was taken back home, thoughts of Marinette continued to echo through his mind as guilt and anger slowly ate their way into him. The moment he was back in his room, Plagg revealed himself from within Adrien's shirt. For once, he was quiet and solemn, not speaking a word until Adrien spoke first.

"I should have saved her." Plagg hovers closely to his chosen's head, the bandages hiding the damage done to him during the attack.

"It wasn't your fault-"

"I SHOULD HAVE SAVED HER!" He slams his fist down on his bed, making the bed gently jiggle beneath him. His breathing becomes shaky as he brings his hands up to his face. "I should have transformed into Chat Noir faster. Marinette would be ALIVE if I had done something!"

"You don't know if she's dead for sure-"

"Nobody found her, Plagg!" He looks up at the black kwami, eyes sharp with anger, guilt, pain, suffering, tears streaming from them as he glares. "They couldn't find her anywhere!" Plagg hovers by uselessly, unable to comfort Adrien as he grieves for his friend. He knows from experience that it's best for humans to vent out their emotions first before trying to comfort them. Many Chat Noirs before Adrien had lost loved ones before, and Adrien was no different. It comes with having bad luck.

Adrien curls within himself and hides his face, cursing and gripping his hair tightly. Plagg could only look on sadly, waiting for Adrien to speak again. The blonde heaved a great sigh before quietly whispering something. The black kwami hovered closer to the boy, listening intently to what he was trying to say.

"...why?" He repeated his question, letting Plagg listen in on his one-sided interrogation. "Why did she save me, and not Marinette? I shouldn't have needed any saving, and yet she picked me over her. And she didn't spare a second thought for Marinette." Plagg gulped nervously. "Hey," Adrien shifted his head slightly closer to Plagg, "why didn't you wake me up?"

"Well you see, I tried waking you up, but unlike me, you don't wake up to anything cheese related." He pauses, gauging Adrien's response before continuing. "But, you did wake up to the sound of Ladybug's voice." Adrien looks at him wordlessly, before laughing bitterly and making Plagg's stomach flop with unease.

"Of course." Adrien uncurled and looked at the ring on his finger. "My Lady." Plagg watched him, nervous as he saw the empty gaze Adrien held on the ring. "Although, maybe she isn't so much of a lady now, as Chat Noir is a hero to the city of Paris." He stood up and stretched his limbs out like a cat, but nothing he did reassured Plagg that everything was okay.

Adrien turned to smile his Adrien smile at Plagg.

"Neither of them managed to save Marinette, after all."

* * *

 **A/N: I have fifty other fanfics to finish writing and this one wasn't one of them ahaha. Oh god I've become ml trash. WELL. I suppose it was only time before I wrote a fanfic for this fandom. I hope you all love angst. Because I love angst.**

 **I'm sure my older readers know what I mean.**

 **On the bright side, no one died! Right?**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Merry Christmas. Or late Christmas. LOL. HAPPY HOLIDAYS.**

* * *

Leaps over the rooftops used to fill him great joy as he thought of meeting up with Ladybug to patrol the city at night or to fight akumas and save the day as the herald heroes of the city. Instead, he is filled with grim determination as he flies from roof to roof, searching for his lady ( _but could he even call her that still after today_ ).

He heads towards their usual meeting spot, thinking that maybe, she'd be there waiting for him to appear.

And lo and behold, after climbing up the Eiffel Tower, he finds her there, hunched over and hugging her knees as she surveys the city from above. He sits down, putting some distance between them as he gazes out into the night. Bitter feelings rise up within him, but before he can voice his thoughts, he's met with an equally bitter tone coming from Ladybug.

"Where were you today?" Her voice is unwavering, but it sounds as if she bit those words out, her eyes refusing to look at him. "I _needed_ you today, but you didn't even show up." He bites back his retort, because she doesn't know that Adrien is Chat Noir, and he bites backs his _but I was there you just wouldn't let me transform,_ because even that would be too mean to say to her. Instead, he grunts and plays with his tail.

"I was held up by something." If he were in any better mood, he probably would have smirked to himself, since he had been held up, quite literally, by Ladybug. But it was due to her carrying him away that he didn't get a chance to transform ( _but was that really her fault a thought whispers to him spreading doubt in his mind was it really her fault or are you just trying to pin the blame on someone else)_.

"And what was that?" She continues to stare out into the city, voice growing cold and harsh as she tries to wrestle an answer out of him.

"Maybe if you looked at my head, you'd figure it out." He spits out his answer angrily, not bothering to feel the slightest bit of guilt by the way she looks over and flinches, her shoulders slumping a bit and her eyes softening at the sight of the bandages.

"I'm… I'm sorry. I didn't know." She doesn't question his angry response, and instead tries sitting closer to him. He moves away from her, almost relishing the hurt expression on her face as he glances at her.

"Marinette." Her eyes widen in shock, and she stutters, something so unlike Ladybug and so like Marinette that his heart clenches, because Marinette is _dead_ and how dare she remind him of her in those ways? "I heard about what happened to her." He looks away at her and at his tail, claws grazing the leather lightly as continues speaking. "I heard that you let her die."

"I didn't let her die!" Ladybug's words come out loud and angry, and he looks up at her in shock as she stands up, fists clenched and body shaking as she glares down at Chat. Her teeth are clenched tightly as she turns away from him, her back shaking as she continues to spit out words in anger, frustration, and hurt. "I didn't. Let her. _Die._ " Chat can only stare at her, and the Adrien part of him almost wants to apologize, but then he remembers her unremorseful tone, and he bites back the apology. Instead, Chat grunts once more and turns his attention back to his tail.

"Then what did happen to her?"

"Why do you care so much?!" Something snaps in Chat, making him turn on Ladybug and snarl at her.

"Because she's my friend!" He says it without thinking, because his mind is filled with Marinette and Alya's tears and her parents' sobs and he's filled with so much anger and he's not even sure if it's directed at himself or at his partner. Ladybug looks at him stunned, before her eyes are suddenly flashing with an anger to match his and she snarls back, all pearly fangs and biting words.

"You only met her once!"

"You don't know that!"

"Oh really?"

"Yeah really!" They stand face to face, inches apart as they growl at each other, looking nothing like the dynamic duo that everyone had loved up until that point. Chat flexes his hands, knowing full well that Ladybug knows nothing about his life behind the mask, about his life as Adrien. She never took the time to get to know him anyway, not that she wanted to in the first place.

It makes him wonder if she really is as great as he had always thought she was. Love made one blind to another's flaws sometimes.

Ladybug opens her mouth to say something, only to shut it and turn away, shoulders stiff as she clenches her fists.

"We need to find that akuma." Her words come out tense and repressed, as though she was holding back something important. He scoffs at her comment and folds his arms.

"Is that all you care about? The akuma? Do you even feel any remorse for Marinette's death?" Ladybug spins on her heel and glares daggers into his skull, eyes fierce with rage.

"SHE'S NOT DEAD!"

"STOP LYING TO YOURSELF!"

"I'M NOT!" The atmosphere was growing tenser by the minute as the two continue to snarl at each other, the raven-haired girl almost on the brink of shedding tears. Chat breathes heavily as his emotions got the best of him.

"How are you so sure that SHE'S alive when SHE was the only one who didn't make it out of the building?" Ladybug bends her head down, trembling as she grits her response out.

"I just know she is, okay? Why can't you just trust me on that?" He scoffs and looks away from her, fingers digging deep into his own arm as he stares out into the city.

"How can I when you treated her life as if it was nothing?"

"I didn't treat her as if she was NOTHING!" She screams at him, feet running towards him as she grabs him by the collar and yanks him down to her height, tears streaming down her face as he's forced to look into her blue eyes ( _eyes so much like Marinette's that it hurts to look at them he used to think that Ladybug's eyes were beautiful_ ). "I'm SORRY that I couldn't save her, alright?! I tried to save everyone I could find, but I couldn't find her! By the time I had rescued Adrien, there was no more time to go back and find her! I can't risk my life for another's when I'm the only one who can cleanse an akuma! And besides, YOU weren't there to help me! So STOP BLAMING ME!" Chat stares at her with wide eyes as he takes her words in slowly.

She's right.

He hates it but she's right.

Ladybug shoves him away and wipes her tears away, taking her yo-yo out and glaring at him.

"We have to find that akuma before there's another casualty." Her voice is cracking, but she holds authority in her tone, demanding that he listen to her. "Now come on. We need to find it quick." With a leap, she jumps off the tower and quickly begins swinging away.

Chat stands by himself, watching her move quickly away into the distance. By the time he finally snaps out of his thoughts, he finds that he can no longer see her in the distance.

But that's okay, he always finds her in the end anyway.

He prepares himself and jumps about the tower, making his way safely to a rooftop before vaulting in the direction that Ladybug had been heading towards.

The tears that had fallen remain ignored as he gradually catches up to her.

 **/-/-/-/-/**

They remain silent as they continue to search for the akuma at night. They had little to no idea what the akuma was trying to achieve, other than complete destruction and chaos. There had to be some reason behind destruction. As Chat tries to recall what happened during his time as Adrien, a loud explosion forces the duo to a stop.

"Where did that come from?" Chat looks around at Ladybug's behest, using his night vision to his advantage as he looks around their surroundings, before spotting the dark wispy tendrils of smoke rising above the rooftops to their left.

"Over there!" He points over to the direction of the smoke, and the two of them quickly make their way to the remains of an abandoned warehouse. The akuma's victim stands in front of them with her back turned to them, her hand swirling a beaker of chemicals slowly.

"Hmm, not as strong of a reaction as I had hoped." The girl tosses the beaker at the warehouse remains, uncaring of the consequences as the mixture splashes about the debris, leaving chemical burns wherever it landed. She turns around and smirks at the heroes, somehow knowing that they are there. "But, it did yield the results that I wanted."

Chat bristles as he glares at the girl clad in a lab coat, the bottoms of it burnt and black as a pair of black-tinted goggles are perched firmly on her head. She wears latex gloves that run all the way up to her elbows and a gas mask hangs from around her neck. Beakers and vials line her waist as they are held there by a belt of some sorts, making it easy for her to reach down and pick a mixture of her choice. A contraption is strapped to her back with tubes flying about and dispensers firmly placed at its sides. On her face lays the usual butterfly mask, black as the akuma that had tainted the girl. She giggles innocently, before reaching back and grabbing a beaker that the contraption dispensed.

"Now you're just in time for my special experiment! I wonder what it takes to make a ladybug's shell boil off? Oh! Or a cat's fur to combust!" He huffs at the akuma's antics before turning to Ladybug.

"What should we do?" Ladybug swung her yo-yo quickly, looking around their surroundings before responding to him.

"First, we should-"

"You know, it's very rude to ignore someone when they're right in front of you!" A beaker is flung at them, exploding just before they both leap away. The ground hisses softly as the chemical mixture burns it. "You didn't even ask for my name." The akuma pouts, already preparing to lob another chemical bomb at them. Chat climbs a lamppost and perches himself on top of it, rolling his eyes and responding in turn.

"Ah yes, why wouldn't we ask the name of the lady trying to use us as experiments? So sorry we're rude, Miss. Mad Chemist!"

"It's Sul-Fury!" She throws the chemical bomb at Chat just as he leaps away to safety, earning a scoff from the black cat.

"Tabby honest, I think my name was a lot better." The akuma shrieks as she took Chat's jabs, lobbing more bombs at the cat. He gracefully dodges each and every one of them (disregarding the few close calls) before Ladybug has wound her yo-yo around the akuma's wrist.

"You two seriously need to come up with better puns." Ladybug grunts slightly as she prevents Sul-Fury from throwing any more bombs. Chat shrugs and leans against the wall.

"My puns aren't that bad. It takes a pure stroke of genius to come up with these on the spot."

"Uh huh."

"Stop ignoring me!" Taking advantage of their bantering, Sul-Fury quickly pulls the gas mask over her mouth with her free hand and presses a button on her contraption, causing it to spit out gases that somehow gave her lift into the air.

Chat's pretty sure chemical gases don't exactly do that, but the powers an akuma could grant are pretty bizarre and out of this world to begin with. With a yelp, Ladybug is carried off into the air with Sul-Fury, who was hissing in pain due to the yo-yo string tied tightly to her wrist.

Frowning, he searches for a way to bring down the flying couple when he felt his lungs starting to burn. He coughs harshly, wheezing as he struggles to breathe. Both he and Ladybug realized why Sul-Fury had a gas mask in her possession - it isn't a fashion statement, but a piece of protection.

"Chat Noir!" Ladybug yells for him from above, coughing less so as she wasn't getting the brunt of the gases. "Get to higher ground!" The cat looks around frantically, a gloved hand covering his mouth and nose as he tried to preserve his breath. With quick leaps and vaults, he manages to escape the area and land on a roof instead, looking around wildly for his partner and the akuma.

"Ladybug?!"

"Over here!" Sul-Fury had landed on a different roof, wrist still attached to the yo-yo string, keeping her from escaping. "Hurry up! I can't keep this up!" He jumps and dashes over the rooftops between them, before skidding to a stop next to his partner. Ladybug immediately releases the akuma and takes a fighting stance, glancing about the roof with a wary glance. Chat follows her example, listening carefully for signs of any living person underneath the roof they were standing on. The akuma growls at them, holding her wrist tenderly against her chest and massaging it gently.

"How dare you! That was my good hand too!"

"What's so good about a hand that hurts people?" Chat is getting tired of distracting her while Ladybug is trying to figure out where the akuma is hiding, so he launches himself at the girl and prepares to attack her. "If you can't do anything good, then why bother doing anything at all?!"

"Chat!" Ladybug's cry fails to stop him as he swung a fist at the girl's face, the girl barely dodging his blow in time and grabbing a pre-mixed vial at her waist. She snarls at him and smashes it by his feet.

"It's better to grab attention for your hard work than to let others stomp all over you because of a simple mistake!" Something inside him snaps, and he drops the half-hearted jibes and banter and explodes, a swirling mass of black and red made of anger and fury and pain and hurt and distress and mourning because _how dare she end the life of Marinette for such a selfish reason._

" **CATACLYSM!"** He raises his hand up in the air and dashes off towards her, black specks of destruction and chaos spinning wildly around his hand. All he sees is red, uncontrollable red as rushes towards the shocked akuma. She's frightened, and rightly so - he can't imagine what his face must look like right now ( _he takes glee in the fact that she's terrified of him revenge is so so sweet_ ). He grabs the front of her coat and yanks her forward, determination set in his eyes as he prepares to strike down.

"CHAT!" Ladybug's yo-yo wraps around his wrist, preventing him from clawing the girl's face off ( _but he intends to do more than just claw her face_ ). He struggles against the string, hissing as it tightens around his wrist and digs into the leather. "CHAT, STOP IT!"

"NO!" He pulls his hand closer to the girl's head as she squeaks in fear, her hands desperately trying to pull his hand off her. "She thinks that she can do whatever she wants and not care about the consequences! Well, it's time I showed her how flawed her thinking is!" His hand is barely an inch away from the crown of her head, and the akuma screams in terror, begging for mercy ( _SHE wasn't shown any mercy_ ) and he can barely hear a voice inside his head screaming at him to stop, he's not THINKING _CLEARLY_ ADRIEN YOU HAVE TO _STOP_ but he won't stop because no one stopped for Marinette and he's so mad so ANGRY it's nothing like he felt before and-

His hand jerks forward, and Ladybug screams in horror.

His luck is terrible, however, as he recalls.

His claws strike down, and he makes contact with the girl's goggles. The goggles crumple, decay, rot into bits and pieces, until they resemble nothing but grey, grey dust, and a single black butterfly flits off.

He doesn't know if it was his bad luck that made him miss.

He doesn't know if it was her good luck that revealed the akuma.

But all he knows is that Ladybug had found the akuma, and the yo-yo released his arm. With his arm free, he makes to wrap his hands around Sul-Fury's neck, to pay retribution, a life for a life, ignoring the scream of " **LUCKY CHARM!** " behind him, ignoring the desperate pleas and cries that this girl is just a victim, she's just a victim just like Marinette _please_ Adrien you have to _stop_ vengeance won't bring her _back_ -

A red and black-spotted lasso is wrapped tightly around him, his arms secured to his sides as Sul-Fury takes a gasp of air and collapses to the ground, her arms and knees supporting her weight as Ladybug quickly catches the akuma and purifies it.

"Bye bye, little butterfly." There's no joy, no warmth in her voice, and Chat Noir isn't there to fistbump her for a job well done. Instead, she watches grimly as he struggles against the rope, screaming and yelling at her to release him RIGHT NOW how DARE SHE after all that has HAPPENED, and he barely registers the soft footsteps that come up behind him, the thin but strong arms that wrap around him, the press of a forehead against his shoulder as she holds him tight.

His miraculous is beeping, and hers is as well, but he's too upset to care.

She hums and rocks him slowly, and she repeats her sorrys, hugging him tightly and whispering soft comforts. He doesn't calm down, but instead sags against her, his back pressing against her chest as his strength finally leaves him. His anger has left him drained, and tears pour from his eyes as grief overcomes him, and he doesn't care anymore about the girl on the ground, wearing a stained lab coat and looking about confused and concerned, about the environment that's been left in shambles, about the remaining two claws on his ring, about the remaining dots on Ladybug's earrings.

Ladybug hugs him, and lets him cry it all out.

He cries and cries, before he's cut short by the desperate beeping of his miraculous, and he clears his throat.

"I, I'm uh, I-I'm sorry."

"I know." She releases him all too soon, and removes the lasso from him. "You should leave, right now."

"...yeah." He doesn't waste a minute and bounds away into the cover of night before he hears the familiar beeping once more, and he's Adrien Agreste, grieving student and friend. Plagg shoots out from his ring, tired and exhausted, and Adrien barely remembers to feed the kwami the cheese in his pocket. He sits down in an alley and leans against the wall, staring up at the sky as the familiar wave of Cleansing Light shimmers through the air. He closes his eyes, waiting for his kwami to finish eating so that he could quickly transform back into Chat Noir and make his way back home quickly

Soon, everything would be returned back to normal, as though nothing had been damaged at all.

Buildings, landscapes, people…

His eyes snap open.

People.

 _Marinette._

"Plagg." The cat kwami was too busy scarfing down whatever cheese Adrien had handed him, and ignored his chosen's words. Adrien frowned and poked Plagg's large head. "Plagg!" The kwami huffed in response, before glaring at Adrien with a sour look.

"Don't think that I'm letting you off the hook after you almost killed that girl. That was stupid and impulsive and you know it!" Adrien flinches, rubbing the back of his neck. Perhaps almost committing murder was something he shouldn't have tried doing in retrospect, but at the time, he had no control over his emotions (or so he would like to think).

"I… I know. That was, terrible of me, to say the least." Plagg nods and continues to eat his cheese, stopping every so often to give a pointed stare at the blonde.

"If it wasn't for Ladybug, she would have died." The boy frowns at the mention of the superhero, before sighing and relenting.

"...yeah."

"We don't need to add another victim to the list."

"Mmgh."

"Well, Ladybug should have fixed everything by now."

"Um, about that." The kwami glances up at his chosen with a curious stare, his mouth finishing off the rest of the cheese. "I want to, to go back to the school."

The kwami blinks once.

Twice.

Adrien holds his breath, and dread fills his chest as Plagg looked away. Of course he's going to refuse, he almost killed an akuma _victim_ he had been no better than her when he was overcome with his emotions he doesn't deserve to have his wishes granted after the stunt he pulled-

"Alright." He lets out a startled squeak because never before had Plagg suddenly act so _compliant before._

"Huh- ah, hh, r-really?" The black cat flies up to Adrien's face and shoves his nose harshly.

"Really. Now hurry up and transform so that we can get this over with and go home." And Adrien smiles, smiles for the first time since the attack with unbridled joy and inexplicable hope that maybe, _maybe_ his luck wasn't that bad, and he transforms into Chat Noir, bounding across rooftops until he sees the familiar arch of his school and he leaps down into, running into the closest classroom he can reach and tearing open the door with hope, desperate desperate hope because the Cleansing Light can fix _anything, right?_

"Princess? Princess!" He calls out to her, bright and cheerful, with a hint of his usual flirty nature, and he waits.

But there's no response.

He frowns, and tries another room.

"Princess! It's me, Chat Noir!"

Nothing.

"...Marinette? It's safe to come out now!"

Another empty room.

He swallows his panic and fights to keep his hope alive. There's plenty of rooms in the school, she's bound to be somewhere around here. He just has to keep looking.

"Marinette! Say something!"

No reply. Dread creeps at the corners of his mind, and he grows more desperate.

"This isn't funny, Marinette!"

He runs from room to room, breathing uneven as he tries to convince himself that the Cleansing Light couldn't have failed, Ladybug couldn't have failed him and Marinette _again_.

He calls and he calls.

Silence rings throughout the school.

He calls and he screams.

His shouts echo throughout the hallways.

He sobs and he begs for her to come back.

But she doesn't come back.

She's not here.

He cries some more, curled up on the floor and letting his chest heave and gasp.

He stays like that, until he can't cry anymore tears.

He gets up.

He leaves.

The school is empty.

 **/-/-/-/-/**

The school is full with life, but Adrien couldn't care less. He walks up the stairs, eyes downcast, and he nearly trips over Alya as the girl sits on the steps, forehead resting on her knees as Nino kneels beside her, doing his best to comfort her.

She mumbles, and Nino nods. Adrien sits down next to her, and he pats her back. The three of them grieve together, quietly, in the bright sunlight when Chloe approaches. The girl stands in front of them, and Adrien looks up at her. Nino gives the girl a warning glare, and she smirks.

But she doesn't say anything. Instead, she gives a sharp "hmph", and walks away, Sabrina trailing behind her, ever obedient, but even she looks disheartened, sad. The bell rings, and Nino and Adrien gently coax Alya up. She stands, albeit a bit wobbly, and they make their way to the lockers.

Everyone is silent as they grab their things, pointedly avoiding the locker closest to the wall, and Alya shakes as she grabs her books. She nearly drops her bag, but Nino catches it for her, and Adrien takes her books for her. She nods her thanks, and the trio makes their way to the classroom.

Alya opens the door, and gasps.

She lets out a sharp cry and runs to her desk.

Nino yells and follows after her, dropping his and Alya's bags on the floor.

Adrien looks inside, and his eyes widen.

It's Marinette.

She sits there, smiling shyly and hugging Alya tightly as the girl sobs into her shoulder. Nino is chattering away, shooting out "I'm so glad!"'s and "You had us worried!"'s. Her blue eyes meet his green, and he drops his and Alya's books on his desk, striding towards her with his hands raised.

Her eyes are swirling with emotion, but no doubt, his are as well, if his vision blurring was any indication.

"M-Marinette…!" He wraps his arms around her, tightly, securely, and buries his face against the crook of her neck, and he doesn't care if he's being weird or clingy she's ALIVE and that's all he cares about. He follows Alya's lead, and he sobs, and sobs and sobs but he's happy, and so, so relieved because Marinette, his PRINCESS, she's alive!

He holds her tight, and doesn't let go, even when Alya releases her best friend and fires questions at her. He listens to her sweet, gentle voice tell Alya that she woke up at the school, and couldn't remember much of what happened ( _he wonders briefly why he couldn't find her last night, but the thought is pushed- SHOVED away because he doesn't care he doesn't care she's here and that's all that matters)_ , and she's gently rubbing his back, because he's still crying and god, he knew Nino's going to tease him about this later but he doesn't care, he just wants to feel her warmth so more, feel her alive in his arms some more.

Nino pulls him off her gently, and he jokes that Adrien is smothering her so much that she might suffocate from his affection, and Marinette is blushing brightly and they all laugh, even if his laugh is a bit watery, and he's wiping away his tears when he notices that his Princess is crying too.

"Hey, it's okay now. You're okay now." He smiles brightly and wipes away her tears, gently, carefully, like she's made of glass and he's almost afraid he might lose this precious, precious girl again. She hiccups and bites her lip.

"I'm so sorry." He frowns, and shakes his head. Alya is getting tissues and handing them to her best friend, and Nino awkwardly hangs around Adrien's back.

"You have nothing to be sorry for." And she looks up at him with her big, round eyes training on him, and he notices the guilt and sadness that's swirling around in her eyes and he doesn't understand why, but he can't stand letting her blame herself for something out of her control.

"You… you all were so worried about me… And you and Alya were crying earlier and-"

"Girl, it doesn't matter now." Alya hugs Marinette from behind and smiles big and bright for the both of them. "What matters is that you're alive- god, you're alive! You're okay, and alive, and fine! And that's all we care about." She nuzzles her cheek and lightly ruffles her hair, earning a giggle from Marinette, and Adrien just nods along. His hands find hers, and he's gripping them tightly, running his thumb gently over her knuckles and smiling just as bright as Alya.

"We're just so happy that you're back with us, Marinette." She twitches in Alya's hold and Adrien's grip, but she smiles anyway, meeting his eyes again with a small smile.

"...yeah." Nino coughs and clears his throat, before peering over his best friend's shoulder.

"Not to break the moment, but uh, have you told your parents that you're alive yet?" Adrien freezes, and immediately releases her hands while Alya laughs and gives him a weird smirk. Marinette nods towards Nino, the small smile looking just a bit more forced.

"Yeah, I did. That was the first thing I did when I woke up here."

"Oh good, that's good! I guess that takes care of that then!" He laughs, carefree and relaxed when Adrien notices that a crowd has formed around them. Their classmates surround Marinette and hug and smother her, and he and Nino are pushed out of the crowd with Alya clinging onto Marinette with a grip of steel ( _he only envies her a little bit_ ). Adrien sighs and Nino nudges his side playfully. "So what was that all about?"

"What was what all about?" He looks at the capped boy with confusion.

"I mean with all the touching and crying! I didn't know you liked her THAT much!" Adrien blinks once, twice, before scratching the back of his neck.

"Uh… Well, isn't that normal when your friend comes back from the dead?" Nino shrugs before sitting down at his seat. Adrien stands next to him, his seat being engulfed by the sea of students greeting Marinette back into the land of the living.

"I guess. But dude, you were seriously all over her. Like, more so than Alya. And Alya is almost like Marinette's girlfriend. If Marinette didn't, well, you know."

"Know, what?" Nino smirks, and leans his chair back.

"Oh, well, I guess you'll find out someday." At that moment, the teacher strides in, and the students are forced to scatter, giving Adrien his seat back, and Marinette and Alya sit behind their respective boys.

He can't help the grin that forms on his face.

She's back.

His Princess.

( _marinette hides behind her notes, eyes trained on her paper as she buries away the guilt and knowledge)_

He'll never take her for granted ever.

( _she bites her lip, and tries not to burst into tears again. be strong, for them._ )

She's important, maybe more so than Ladybug.

( _it's her fault, but they'll never know._ )

No, without Ladybug, Marinette wouldn't have come back, even if Ladybug didn't save her at first.

( _she tricked adrien._ )

Ladybug pulled through in the end, but Adrien lowers her from the pedestal he once kept her on.

( _she betrayed chat's trust._ )

She's on the same level as Marinette now - both equally special, equally important.

( _she was never dead, but she'll let them continue to believe she was._ )

He smiles brightly.

( _she frowns darkly._ )

He'll protect them both.

( _she hurt them both._ )

* * *

 **A/N: Haha this was supposed to be done in NOVEMBER, so I'm so sorry for the long wait aah. But being in college and playing Undertale (obsessively), I kinda got uh, distracted. BUT HEY! BETTER LATE THAN NEVER RIGHT? HAHAHa whoops.**

 **I might make a companion fic to this I dunno. It's gonna be focused on Marinette's point of view.**


End file.
